Thursday, January 11, 2007

Men in the House

This morning, before I'd even had my green tea let alone coffee, there were men in my house. Three + The Jr Boy. There was plywood stacked in the hall, power tools upstairs, a shop-vac drying out the toilets, one estimate for sub-tile heating and A PLAN! Oh frabjous day, calloo callay!!

This is the project The Sr Boy and I were going to "do" when we realized that the blasting being done for the (disgusting and boring and environmentally harmful to wildlife go see "So Much for the Tulips") new subdivision had probably cracked the grouting and was contributing to the fast drainage of the shower. We had gotten as far as siliconing (Himself's contribution) the cracks and dragging out magazines. After the funeral, I found our lists for the project. His read "do bathroom". Mine read "price fixtures, price flooring, find electrician, ask Jimmy to do plumbing, drywall??, Ralf???, paint chips, tear down - can this stuff go in the garbage? (answer: No - special trip to landfill required), refinish floors instead?, new vanity/bath/shower in big bath or live with?, budget??????"

Ralf is the most important part of that list. Ralf is our friend from forever who is a designer and whose wife said, "Ralf will help" when everything else fell apart and I still had a leaky shower. Ralf said, "Take up the floor, take down the tile and those 2x4s and that (tacky - he's too polite for that but it was obvious) wallboard in the storage cupboard and call me." The Jr Boy started and the mess was appalling. We discovered that the floor of the shower was 15cm of sand and concrete, that tiles make really sharp edges when broken, that wet gyproc is disgusting. And that the @#%%*& parquet flooring was apparently stuck down with crazy glue. Tapping it off with a hammer and screwdriver, one parquet at a time, was strangely meditative but immensely time consuming.

That was back in October and then there was the entertainment of The Eviction which took up my November energy followed by Christmas which finished off December's energy. On Himself's (and Elvis') birthday, Ralf came back and said, "Leave the rest of the floor but get those tiles off the ceiling of the shower and I'll be back Thursday with the electrician and the labourer."

Today is Thursday.

Things I have learned: I am a heller for tearing stuff apart: not too polished with the sledge and pinch bars but I get the job done. I also look like Revenge of the Reno Nerds in my attractive Reno Clothes: from the bottom: hiking boots (after dropping something on my slippered foot - no Workers' Comp on this job), ancient flowered pull-on trousers, ditto sweatshirt, and, (too bad there are no pictures... no really, use your imaginations) my head/eye protection which consisted of my glasses covered with safety glasses in day-glo yellow and a ball cap underneath The Jr Boy's old bike helmet. Be very glad you weren't here!

On the coldest day so far this winter, I am off to tour the RenoPorn stores with The Jr Boy and Ralf. If the borrowed car starts. If I can get it open in this cold.

Should you look, you can see me: still breathing - looking as if I am smoking a la a kid on the first frosty day.


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